I DEMAND SOME SERIOUS PROPOSAL FIC RIGHT NOW. COME ON, PEOPLE.

J2 will always be my main love but if I'm going to read some het, Danneel better damn well be in it and I WANT SOME PROPOSAL FIC!

*throws confetti*

I'm just so HAPPY for them! I don't fear for the fandom at ALL really, (esp if Jared and Gen are engaged too, that's just too perfect for double-blind scenarios.

OOO! In fact, I feel compelled to point out that Jensen and Danneel started being more open and spending-time ish around when Genevieve started working on Spn. Did Danneel develop an epic romance? I THINK SO. In fact, someone also needs to write the epic romance of Gen and Danneel as well in the context of some J2 lovvviiin.)

Okay, back in reality-land, so, SO happy for Jensen and Danneel. I really hope it works out for them.

(linky, for those who don't know)

Also, another 700 words today. Aiming to finish tomorrow or Weds. Also sorted out majority of enrolment for 2010. Yay.

Oh gosh, I'm sorry for the endless updates lately, I tend to post a lot when I'm writing. Or facebook. But I'm having an anti-facebook week so you poor folks get me instead.

So I just finished the final scene! There's still the earlier one or two to write, but the ending is all endy and over and *flaps* this feel really significant for me because this is essentially my first longish fic actually FINISHED. And I actually LIKE it! It's not perfect, but the ending is good enough that it's making me all teary and flappy and, and, and I hope it make you feel that way, too, I just gotta finish it, first!

I was stuck on 131 words earlier so I was like, 'eh, better put in the effort to get to my 200' and then I got all sucked in and everything was flowing and it ended up being 1,247! Yaaaay! Gonna try do more while I'm on a roll but it's so time for a word-count check. I am so enamoured of mini_nano right now THERE ARE NO WORDS! (OR MAYBE LOTS, DEPENDING ON HOW YOU READ THAT!)

3981 / 7000 words. 57% done!

I had an exciting moment on Friday while writing when I suddenly realised that I was writing the last scene of my post-S4 AU. I was a little surprised, because I'd been expecting the write maybe another four or so after that, but a little voice went, 'You know, this would be a really good point to end the fic.' and after thinking about it for a while I couldn't help but agree.

SO! I have to finish this scene, and there are two earlier scenes I've basically just gone, 'put the scene with the coffee and knives here' or whatever, but after that and some editing it will, after five months, be DONE.

(I don't suppose anyone would be able to pull beta duty for me in a couple of days?)

EEE! Excited!!

Wow, okay, life overload. I'm up in Blenheim at the moment, staying with Mum and Dad until Saturday. Finished class okay, I can pick up my final assignments when I get back which I'm pretty keen to do, and gotta sort out my enrolment for next year, which potentially is going to be extremely confusing because I have a mental year of half-undergrad half-honours including a whole-year paper that I have to start half-way through and BAH! Yeah, I have to go in to do it in person, because it's not going to work online.

Anyway! I'm doing mini_nanowrimo, 200 words minimum a day. Got about 500 so far. Working on my Season 4 follow up first. It's at 10,000 words at the moment, I'm hoping to finish it pretty soon. I think it doesn't completely suck, so looking forward to that. After that I'm working on another Spn WiP, I think. But for some reason I don't feel like telling anyone about what's happening with that one, but I really really like it. (To the point where I'm finding it hard to continue it because what's there is so good I don't want to ruin it!)

Been working a million hours, (last week it was 46, including one 13 hour day. No thanks) but that's over now for 11 days. 11 whole days of FREEDOM. Hoping to do lots and lots of writing, catching up with people and reeessting.

What's going on with everyone else? I have been totally fail at the internet over the last month. So so so so so so sorry!

I just got very confused as to why I had a tab open in the corner of Firefox that appeared on first glance to be about the Satan Bible. o_0

Then my brain engaged and I remembered that all of oh, ten minutes ago, I was looking up references to Satan in the Bible for the fic I'm writing. But yeah. Confusion moment. Today I am at 600 words and counting. (Fic is at 5,600), about another 3-4 scenes to go I hope before it's done. Looks like my estimate of 10,000 words will be about right.

I had an awesome night and Kung Fu yesterday, I actually was getting a lot of stuff right, and so were most of the other newer students and our Instructor was getting really excited that we were so in the game. Was a real buz. Anyway, I have to stop writing here or I'm not going to have time to finish this scene before uni this avo. Might be making Pavlova tomorrow! Exciiiiiting! (My first! It'll probably flop but I DON'T CARE!)


EDIT: 1,000 words and scene 1 is done! (I skipped it earlier because I wasn't sure what the show would do and if I could work it in.) Getting close to the finiiiiish. I am exciiiited. It's been so long since I've put up a complete story!

Okay, maybe that's a little overkill, (Sam does already have enough fie in his life without me adding to it,) but DAMN if that boy is hard to write! Usually one of this things I don't have too much trouble with in writing is getting the voices right, but Sam just keeps sounding like Dean! AHRG! How does Jared make him sound so different? I really don't have enough time to go on a Sam-voice mission right now!

I'm trying to get this darned fic done before Friday (I'm in the future, it's Friday here when it comes out.) I had given up on any chances but then I got all inspiiiired. And I'm so close! But I have an assignment to write and only today and tomorrow to do both but I'm SO CLOSE! And the extra hard bit is depending on what happens in ep 5_01 I could either get completely Jossed OR be able to work this fic in with minimal trouble and have a whole extra week to work on it but there's NO WAY TO BE SURE!

Meanwhile Sam is being annoying. But I love him anyway. Oh sigh.

EDIT: 1,600 words later I have to run to get my assignment done but I'm liking the chances of this fic getting finished tomorrow. Anyone going to be around to look it over because I'm going to have to post in a hurry? Even if I can't get it done I'm pretty happy with what I've got so I'll put it out even if the show stuffs it up.

Man! The last two weeks have been so insanely busy! Today is my first real day off in weeks! I was supposed to have a big list of things to do but I just thought, 'hang on, sanity has to come before other things', so I'm taking a mental health day and staying home instead of heading into uni.

I HAVE, however, been working quietly on fic. I think I've sorted out the main problems with my post-22 fic, and done about 500 words on it today. I deleted 2,000 words last week so I'm glad I've (hopefully) fixed it. I'm also trying to leave room for it to be vaguely S5 compliant because since I have two assignments and only 3 more days of not-work between now and the 10th, (11th here, technically,) I doubt I'll have it finished before then!

I kind of hate my new job at the moment, but that's mainly because I haven't had my proper days off this holidays and I'm very aware that this was my only time for a break before the end of semester.

OH, and I found out today that the ONE paper I need to take to graduate has been moved to second semester next year. So uh, unless I can convince them to let me out of it, my degree is delayed by a YEAR. Trust me when I tell you that I was NOT IMPRESSED AT ALL! I've sent off an email straight away, because I'm FURIOUS. Because if they had informed us in advance I could have either taken it this year, or not taken it, gotten out of it and I would have been finishing THIS semester. I am SOOOOOOOO FUCKED OFF.

Finally, I'm working on the next episode of my anime now as well. I've so far mentally cast Jared, Jensen AND Danneel to play various characters.

That's enough of me talking for one day. Love love!

EDIT: Oh, and I just wanted to have a little mini-spaz over the fact that my supernatural/J2 folder in my bookmarks reached 400 fics this week. 400! I have an addiction and no shame!

Wheee, I can has new layout! It's so cleeeean, and simpllllle. I've also set up another LJ to help my Dad with a whole lot of stuff related to getting his church online, and it is ALSO very pretty and has a million gorgeous icons that I can't fit over here. (mostly because I am nostalgic for my cute home-made c/p icons from a million years ago) I wish I could show you guys but it's under my real name and all related to family and churchy things (I had to not pick one icon I liked because it was to seeeexy. Sad day.) BUT, very cool. I will always love this journal the most, oh yeah!

I don't have time for a proper entry but a few things:

I started a new job this week! Eee! It was very scary and hardcore. It's for one of the top jewellery chain stores in NZ and it's pretty intense in terms of their standards and the amount of product knowledge you have to have. I know SO MUCH MORE about diamonds and gold right now than I EVER thought I would. Too bad for me I don't really LIKE diamonds, otherwise I'd be screaming with joy right now. Anyway, was epic. Downsides: location is an hour's travelling away from my house. Also, 25 hours a week. (To reference that, I WAS working 10. :/) Upsides: Cool people, less EEEE STRESSSSS than old job, and HOLY CRAP I'M GOING TO HAVE SO MUCH MONEY. (in comparison to what I was doing...) Oh, and they want me to work full time over the holidays. WIN. So yeah, it's going to be a lot of pressure next term balancing uni and job, but hopefully I'll manage.

Still working on 2 Spn fics. They're both okay? We'll see how they go. Both probably will be about 10,000 words, at around 3,000 now.

Okay, I gotta go finish reading Ernest Hemingway's Green Hills of Africa. It's for class. I don't recommend it to ANYONE. It's 200 pages of shooting rhinos and lions and leopards and oh GOSH it's horrible. STAY AWAY FROM THE BEAUTIFUL WONDERS OF NATURE! YOU CAN APPRECIATE THEM WITHOUT HAVING TO KILL THEM! FOR FUCK'S SAKE!

I would like to preface this with two things. One, I am COMPLETELY unspoiled. Two, I want to say a big thank you to everyone in fandom who is being really considerate about spoiling.


But HOLY FUCK it's hard to avoid spoilers right now. Like, they're EVERYWHERE. You can't go two seconds right now in fandom without seeing a spoiler cut. And yes, I'm extremely grateful that (on LJ at least) those are spoiler CUTS not the actual information, but but... *flails* I really want to reeeeead them! And every time I manage to resist, I move all of about four pages down and BAM there's another one!

@_@


Meanwhile, I'm still working surprisingly hard on fic this week, there's one in particular I want to get out before S5 starts so I'm trying to hurry but it's coming out completely crap, so that's annoying. :/ And my essay is due tomorrow and only half-done. Woooo.

EDIT: My evening went... posted entry, got on twitter, got spoiled. *laughs helplessly*

EDIT EDIT: Discussion of said casting spoiler in comments. But seriously, if you're freaking out like I was, don't. It has nothing to do with the actual plot of the show.

It's a lie, if you tell anyone you saw me, I'll come and shoot you. I swear, I am very scary and... you know, armed. (In my country where arms are illegal. Though not ARMS, because of course we have THOSE. GOSH!)

I just wanted to have a teeny flag-waving moment, because today I wrote 2,300 words of a brand new shiny fic which my dreams provided for me (Sam/Dean dreams for the win!) to comfort me because I'm jammed on all my other fic at the moment.

And then I wrote a poem that I think is really kick-ass. I'll post when it's edited.

Unfortunately, I did NOT do any work on my essay which is due next Friday. Woo, scary. I have major assignments every two weeks this semester. It's CRAZY.

Oh, and (part of the crazy that is keeping me well and truly submersed in life) I have a job interview on Tuesday. Hoping not to be at my current job for more than a few more weeks.

Love love.

Do you guys ever get to a point in a fic where, I dunno, there’s a chapter end or a big reveal and you finish the line and, even if it’s totally un-postable, your instinct is to go, ‘There! Now post!’ just because you want an instant reaction?

I’m supposed to be studying or sleeping right now but I’m being sneaky to write fic because I really needed a creative outlet at the moment and in general just something that I could work on, enjoy, and FINISH. So, a short fic hopefully to be finished soon. Season 4 coda. Just trying to figure out how to a) shut up, and b) fit in some sexiness, at this point.

Just for reference, I’m kind of on an internet-mini-hiatus at the moment. I’m in a kind of crazy-negative mad brain-spaz space and really needing a lot of no-people time, and that includes internet-people. I am trying to catch up with fic responses but even there I’m pretty fail. So, if you don’t see me, don’t panic, I’m probably not dead, just off kicking a wall or something somewhere.

You know that Wordle craze that flashed through the interwebs a few months ago? Well, actually a really great writing tool, because mine was like, 'DEAN, SAM, LOOKED, tinywordstinywords' Apparently I use 'looked' WAY more than any human being ever needs to look at anything.

I bring this up because I'm working on the post-beta final edit of DMT_07 at the moment (yeah, you heard me!) and every time I see the word 'looked' I'm like 'AAAAHHHRR!! *gets out the stabby knives*'

In all seriousness, it's really great to see how much I've improved as a writer since I wrote this, but in the mean time it's kind of painful that I have to put it online. But, I'm also really, REALLY glad that I AM still improving, that my 'art' isn't stagnating and this time writing fanfic (instead of original fic) isn't wasted after all.

*scampers back to editing hell*

EDIT: Wow... the bank just decided to charge me $40 for various fees because I didn't get around to renewing my student (fee-free) account and because my overdraft is so huge. That was my food money. Now I have to cut into my piddly $50 of savings so that I can EAT which was SUPPOSED to be one day for paying back the bank. Good job, guys, good job! *tries really, really hard not to get really, really upset*

Ahrg, this is so poos. I'm in the mood to write, this day is scheduled for writing, I want to write something sweet and snuggly, but my muse has flown the coop! Waah!

I have three hours, three files open and no inspiration. Someone help! Cast a spell on me or give me a bunny or something! I've looked through my story-ideas file and nothing is filling me with joy. :( :( :( heeeeeeeelp meeeee.

On a mildly-related note, my manager yesterday was like, 'can you please work for 6 hours on one of your Annual Leave days you've had booked in for a month because you were stupid enough to tell us you'll actually be in town on that day, even though it's one of the only three days this YEAR you'll get to spend with both your brothers.' And then she had the nerve to ask me this morning if I could work tomorrow, too, so even though I have no plans tomorrow I was like, 'no, fuck off.' (paraphrase) because these are the few freaking days in my year I have time for writing and fuck if I'm going to give them all up to bloody WORK! ARG! And they all guilt me out because everyone is taking holidays at the same time and there's no cover, but man, once a year, ONCE A FREAKING YEAR my whole family gets together and I'm not giving up a freaking second of that to the same employers who don't let me go home for freaking christmas! *cough* so... yeah, that has me pissed off. -_-;;;

Do you guys know what I’m doing today? NOTHING! Yeah, that’s right! NOT A THING! I am puttering around the house in my PJs, I’m stealing my flatmate’s food so I don’t have to leave the house, I’m being sleepy, reading books and in general not using this day for anything productive. Why? Because I NEVER GET TO DO THIS! Well, not in the six weeks or so. And I only have today for it before work starts and begin my epic holidays-are-the-only-time-for-writing-these-days mission of DOOM.

I feel like it’s been about three months since I’ve updated. It hasn’t been all that long but so much has been going on. Since last entry, I have finished all essays, exams and etceteras. I am slowly gaining back my sanity, I’ve read about two thousand big bangs, and have even done a pile of writing.

I got an A- back on one of my big essays, which makes me hopeful I might end up with an A- for the paper. (If I can do THAT, then I reckon I can get my overall grade up to A’s by the end of next semester. If I can do THAT then I should be able to get funding up the wazzoo for masters. Unless there’s like, ten thousand applicants in my year. And if THAT happens I’ll just go around and bash them all until they quit. Easy.) I also got an A back yesterday on my anime script. Which was SUCH a personal victory because that lecturer marks REALLY hard. And I also agreed with all his con-crit so I really appreciate that I’ll be able to incorporate that criticism when I go back to edit it in a few months.

I just had mimei to visit for a week! It was really really awesome. We did lots of stuff, we sat and read things, she tried not to get addicted to Fall Out Boy fandom (and failed) I lol’d in her general direction. My cat was a giant snob and refused to acknowledge her for the entire trip. I shared with her how much fun it is to have a friend doing sculpture Fine Arts (performance art assistants FTW!) She forced me at knife-point to sign up to twitter (page_r was already taken! Arg!) and there was epic media-swaps.

This entry is getting really long so I’ll finish by saying the next chapter of DMTs WILL be going up these holidays. Even if I have to post something I think is complete shite. I also have the fist sequel to Pack Your Bags semi-finished. And about three other fics I might get done.

And finally:

-There is a limit to how many question marks are required. In any situation, know that there is a limit. EVEN IN LOL-CATS there is a limit. I know it sounds impossible, but seriously guys.