25 December 2006 @ 10:55 pm
Christmas Day. oh hooray...  
Is it a sign of my being a horrible person if I spent the majority of today watching the entire Gravitation series?

But in my defence this has been the Christmas for HELL. Or at least, the lead-up to Christmas from hell. This last month has stressed me to my absolute limit and I've been riding on a pretty constant thin-edge of total emotional meltdown.

Last night at around 1am as I sat with my mother on a chair outside church waiting for my dad, I said 'I think from this year on I am cancelling Christmas' This year has been Fucked Up.

Summary of Fucked-ness:

1. Church. In the advent weeks -the six (I think it's six, I don't really pay much attention to those sorts of things) weeks leading up to christmas- we have had a short drama each week depicting a segment of a theoretical journey of the wise men to Bethlehem. One of these I wrote, two I acted in and on christmas eve-midnight service and the main Christmas day service, there was supposed to be a powerpoint displaying a brief summary of Jesus' ministry and some of the things his life (and death) contributed to. Powerpoint was my responsiblility.

Well, let me just say that it was one of the most trying technical experiences of my life. It didn't come out too bad but it wasn't really how I wanted it to be.

Oh and. Christmas day service I was the lead saprano for the band. Both the band leader and the only other female vocalist were losing their voices due to Madd Caroling and colds. Eeep! Uber Carols with Really High Parts. Eeep! Crazy modern songs with Really Low Parts. @_@ By the end by voice was cracking. (I'm really a metzo so while I can get the notes, my vocal cords get annoyed with me for doing anything really high or really low).

2. Money. This has been this GIANT EVIL MONSTER issue for me facing only one month to go before having to start paying for the hostels. While work has picked up a bit in the last two weeks, the problem with this is that I don't really seem physically capable of working for more than about 2&1/2 hours straight without being in considerable pain. And when I say considerable pain I mean, 'after an hour of this I can't even concentrate on what the person in front of me is saying'. This means 3-4 hour shifts, while they would get me away to Uni alright, aren't %100 viable. >:{ Anyway, I've decided to offically stop worrying about money because the worrying doesn't change anything.

3. Christmas. Present buying on behalf of practically the whole family because no-one else bothers if I don't do it. Card-sending; to everyone, because I can't send presents because I'm poor but I wanted everyone to know that they were loved. (Yes, I did forget people. *sigh*)

4. Writing. -_-;; 'nough-said.

5. Other stuff that I've temporarily forgotten but which is REALLY STRESSFUL.

Last night someone asked me, "How's your christmas-eve going?" I said, "Well, I've only broken into tears three times today, to I think I'm doing well" They were a little shocked. *snigger*

ANYWAY! Despite all this, after the service today I had a really nice day with my parents, lots of anime, some cool presents (Mum got me this STUNNER set of fancy drawing pencils -my suggestion, but hey, what works, works-) Delish food and most of all - PEACE AND QUIET! I'm going to focus on doing NOTHING all day tomorrow. (Apart from perhaps attacking the chapter again.) So yeah, I go out with a good feeling but a lesson learnt on over-commitments at this time of year.

6 days till my 20th birthday now. *sighs* At least I'm not organising THAT!

I'm not going to spell or grammar check this update coz I've got other things to do. Sorry. XP

Hope everyone else had/is having a good Christmas/whatever. Will post mimei's christmas band-slash short present thingy tomorrow.

shnuu! *hugs*
 
 
Current Music: Carols stuck in my head
Current Mood: relieved
 
 
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[identity profile] mimei.livejournal.com on December 25th, 2006 11:51 am (UTC)
who knew church could be such a bucket of stress ne? *pets* you take on too much responsibility. you should join me in crafting a persona of complete unreliability. then no one will expect anything of you!!! (think Youji from Weiss Kreuz!) ♥ if i were there i would hug you muchly. *hugs* (and if it helps i posted some short fics at [livejournal.com profile] bluetent)

*pets your voice*

money, argh. i see in the way of the ancients: Fortune is a wheel. it goes down, but it always goes up again. then it goes down. etc. has held true so far ;) maybe you can get a nice crappy office job where you get to sit down lots when you get to uni. then you could do more hours, right.

i'm glad xmas was good after church though :)

zomg, you're going to be 20!!! WE NEED TO PAR-TAY.
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[identity profile] prairie-grass.livejournal.com on December 25th, 2006 12:05 pm (UTC)
Who knew? Who knew? ..... I think my parents both put in about 150-200 hours EACH JUST for christmas. They knew. I knew. We still did everything anyway. -_-; YAY! Unreliability! I'm trying to culture that with texts and emails, so everyone is trained not to expect replies. *evil grin*

Thank you for the hugs. I will read stuffs in the morning when not chronicly tired.

Wow. I don't think my voice has ever been petted before. Cool.

Dude. True. Except I need it to go way, way up because it's about to go way, way down, and I don't want the wheel to hit the cold, hard, rocky ground.
Sitting down-job yay!

Yeah. Same.

I know! I'll be OOOOOLD! Come stay with me for a few days and we'll have joyus marathons in celebration of my ever-closer death! @_@ (man my brain is doing odd things at the moment... too much sugar, not enough sleep)
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[identity profile] krm--authoress.livejournal.com on December 25th, 2006 10:12 pm (UTC)
Sorry you're having just a bad time. *huggle snuggle, not letting you go till you feel better*

Well, my day wasn't much better. We had Christmas last night, and mom decided today was the day to rearrange my room. That went over WELL in the beginning. Thing is with my mom, she thinks my room is cluttered and wants me to throw away all my "junk", which most of like holds sentimental value. So she started picking through my things, and wouldn't leave them along even when I politely asked three times. Sorry to say I lost it and screamed.

But its better now, and I think I've discovered how big my room really is *and gained about half of my floor space back into view*

Did you like the pictures? And what's that address in Canada, cause I wanna right to you~ (I like writing actual letters than emails~)
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[identity profile] krm--authoress.livejournal.com on December 25th, 2006 10:13 pm (UTC)
(Oh, forgot to mention. I'm seriously thinking about writing a book, with my families help, about the cats in our house/that cats that we've fostered)
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[identity profile] prairie-grass.livejournal.com on December 26th, 2006 02:59 am (UTC)
Ooooo! Neat! Would it be fiction or non-fiction?
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[identity profile] krm--authoress.livejournal.com on December 26th, 2006 04:00 pm (UTC)
Non-fiction. Like, all the things that have actually happened, how some of the cats came to us, and stories about the ones that we have fostered.

(Though, it sort of gives me an idea for a fiction book from the viewpoint of the cats...)
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[identity profile] prairie-grass.livejournal.com on December 26th, 2006 10:04 pm (UTC)
Wow, that would be really cool! And would help people to learn heaps about taking care of kittens/cats. Go for it!
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[identity profile] prairie-grass.livejournal.com on December 26th, 2006 02:58 am (UTC)
meh. Thanks though. Everything is over now so I do feel better.

Oh man. Mums in bedrooms. @_@ My mother still has trouble not automatically tidying my room. It's like she has to physically restrain herself.

Yay for floor-space!

I LOVED the pictures! I was actually going to write back today but you commented first so this gets a response. Yeah, I squeed SOOOOO much over the two part-pheonix babies. CUTENESSS! You are getting so much better at drawing, it's great. I got these really lovely coloured pencils for christmas so I am working on your late christmas present today. :D

What Canada address? My pen-pal? She's in Ontario. Do you want my postal addy? (I like writing letters, too).
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[identity profile] krm--authoress.livejournal.com on December 26th, 2006 04:04 pm (UTC)
Glad you liked the pictures so much. (Actually have another picture of the babies in the works)

Yes~~~ *heart* Some postal address~ so I can stalk you! And send you hearts and candy and lepercuns!

Well, not really. Dad's making me this letter/writing sorter to sit on my desk that can hold letters/stamps/envelops and the like. So I want to send everyone letters!
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[identity profile] prairie-grass.livejournal.com on December 26th, 2006 10:07 pm (UTC)
Yay, more piccies!

K! One postal address on the way! *emails*

I'm looking forward to the leprechauns!
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